Overwhelmed with bliss are all
who will entwine their hearts in him, Isaiah 30:18 (TPT)
A brother shared with me about a recent experience, of spending an entire week in the intimate presence of God. Every day, through long, intense hours, God was pouring out revelations to him. It was, as he said, “powerful and humbling,” but in the end, he felt spent.
What he described is something I greatly covet. I’ve had times of this, so can relate, but they don’t happen as often as I’d like. I’m blessed more often by the gentleness of raindrops than by waves, but it is the “waves” of spiritual intimacy that sometimes God has us experience for a more accelerated understanding of His heart.
But I know…intense revelations come at a greater cost. And it is a process of being mature enough to handle them in humility and faithfulness. Each step up the mountain requires yet another layer of our independent self to be shed and left behind. “For no one can see God, and live.” Our natural bodies are not equipped for supernatural power, without supernatural help.
The Shulamite woman “had it bad,” as the saying goes, in the crashing waves of human love. She cries out, (possibly to her friends, the daughters of Jerusalem) “I am sick with love!” – Song 2:5.
Lovesickness is a fascinating phenomenon that happens to those who “fall in love,” that can feel both wonderful and miserable at the same time. It can become unbearable, however, if separated from the object of love, or unsure of reciprocity. Physical symptoms include butterflies in the stomach, palpitations of the heart, weak knees, and a deep ache. Yes, love hurts! Gladys Knight describes it well in her song of the same title:
“When you know that you’re alive ’cause you feel so much pain
When you feel you can’t survive but you make it anyway
When it feels too good to stop but it hurts too much to stay
Then you know, yes you know, that love hurts…”
http://www.songlyrics.com/gladys-knight/love-hurts-lyrics/
Losing control to lovesickness can be scary, so some push it down or run from it it. But with absolute abandon the Shulamite feels faint, and only wants more. She requests:
“Sustain me with raisin cakes! Refresh me with apples! For I am sick with love.” – Song 2:5
I can’t say I totally understand what apples and raisin cakes represent, except that she was asking for her cure to be more of what was causing her lovesickness to begin with! Just previously, she likened her beloved to an apple tree (2:3)— so apples are like words from him, for her present moment. And then she was taken to his wine house (2:4) — so a raisin cake (made of dried grapes) is like strength from him, for her separated moments.
I think one of the reasons why we don’t have mountaintop experiences more often, is that we come down leaning on our own understanding. What we need to learn is that without Christ we are powerless, and to depend on His guidance and His strength for every aspect of our life!
As it says: “All your fruit comes from Me.” – Hosea 4:8.
